Deep thoughts

To everyone out there, I live a dramatic life. I can probably make a tv series out of it because of what's happened/happening. It's really stupid and what I hate the most is that i have to lie about a lot of things. I have to act like my life is fine even though it isn't.. And I know "3rd world countries are far worse then you are" but whatever lol. It kills me how much this bugs me, and even as I am writing this, I still have to keep it inside...but whatever, I gotta just accept it and move on right? I just hope I can finally put these things past me and have a future.

Lately I haven't been having the family/cousin time. Being so busy with school and all, I can't make time for them. My grandma had surgery and I haven't even visited her and she just came back from Philippines like 2 weeks ago. I never made the initiative to see them. Family is really important to me, and not seeing them is killing my moods. Even if some of my cousins are annoying, i still wouldn't mind seeing them. ugh i miss my family =(

One thing I dislike the most is how my house is always messy. My house acts like a dorm and nothing gets done. It's like a bunch of frat boys living together and it becomes a shithole of an apartment. Sometimes after a long day of school I want to sit down with my family and just talk about how things are going.... half the time I don't even know where anyone is. Only person in my house is boots and me..and I have to say he's a good listener haha but yeah that's saved for another day. So yeah this is my little emo mode/deep thoughts/ just shit on my mind I need to say out loud

And this Isn't a pity read, its just what's on my mind.

so new post soon, and it's good to be back =D